I have to wonder why people lash out rather than moving on.

I understand defending a friend or one's self, but deciding -- randomly -- that you are being prosecuted against and snubbed because it's easier than trying to understand, is beyond me.

Perhaps it's easier than looking at the intent; if you believe that the world is out to get you then you can find proof everywhere. It's called a self actuating prophecy.

But wouldn't it be just as easy to believe that someone was playing or mis spoke?

Take that extra step, look beyond your self hatred. You over estimate your dark importance. You're not the center of everyone's universe, just your own, to think otherwise is to set yourself up for big time hurt. The twisted and perverse are distractions, they won't keep the kind crowds.

Like attracts like; learn to forgive -- yourself and others -- and find the beacon that will set you free.

Or don't.

Whatever.

To the tune of Satisifed.

Freakafied
(with apologizes to Craig Northey)

Add it to my list
Of smart and funny
Shows I cannot miss
Headcrushing good times
Evil laughter
And men not afraid to kiss
There are padded bras
And skirts to wear
Wigs, heels, and tights
Clapping's ecstatic
Losing my voice
But screaming feels right.

After all those skits (I'm Freakafied)
The new ones -- the hits (I'm Freakafied)
'Til egos take their wits (I'm Freakafied)

Out at the back
I'm stage door waiting
Better this than home
They'll be leaving
Not now but later morning
When the beer is gone
Dave, Mark, and Scott stop
Kevin's just a blur
Bruce and scarf pause
They're on the bus now --
"Thank you, sirs!"

Now that it's done (I'm Freakafied)
It sure was fun (I'm Freakafied)
Until the next one (I'm Freakafied)

Put in a HBO tape
Or Giddyup CD
Bring back all the feelings
That mean so much to me.

I swear I'm fine (I'm Freakafied)
I know the signs (I'm Freakafied)
Just like the last time (I'm Freakafied)

What a weekend!

Random images:

Tavie's laughing face as she is complementing me, "Good line."

My finger as it moves towards Dave's tummy as I ask, "What do you have on you?"

Steve's eyes shining with tears just before he gets into the cab that will take him to the airport.

Mark's face through the view finder of my video camera as he walks into the Virgin Mega Store.

Crissy's smiling face as I shake her hand and tell her she is gorgeous and she squeezes my hand and glows as if she had never heard this before.

In the crowded backseat of the rental car, Diane carries on a serious conversation with Matthew as she lay across the laps of Steve and Tavie, her head resting on Matthew's knees.

Details to follow.

Have you ever had something happen that both releaved you and made you sad? Not like death, but something less tragic.

I've been worried about Tavie staying with me because I've been so wiggly lately when it comes to sleeping that I was worried that any sleep she got would be while waiting in line for the show. I was looking forward to having her here and within my snuggle zone. She is a total night person and I a total day person, when I got up to make coffee and spinach omelettes she would be turning in