Pre-birthday Blues

It happens every year; as each day moves me closer to The Day I get more depressed and feel like a waste. This year especially because I'm living with friends - on the east coast - with no home to return to out west - broke and in debt - this is the lowest point - and I'm turning forty-fucking-five.

I'm the college kid that moves back with mom and dad when the real world "doesn't work out." I didn't have a failure to launch; I launched and flew in pointless loop-de-loops then crashed back onto the launching pad. I'm shrapnel and debris - I'm the forensic evidence that experts paw through before dumping on the scrap heap.

I'll be better come Tuesday.