Why is it...

That obituaries always say that someone has passed, or died, or is "sitting at the feet of Jesus," following a "courageous battle with cancer"? Hasn't anyone given a half hearted fight?

"Why, cancer, I ought ta....ohhhhhh, never mind."

I read my hometown obituaries, I want to see if any of the people who made my life hell in High School have had any battles lately. I know it seems petty and it is, if I'm going to be honest about it, but as an adult I can't go up to another adult and hit them with some Math books. Revenge is sweet but I don't want to look like an ass. If I could I would turn down their bank loans while muttering, "Cut in front of me, will you..." I would touch the rice I served them if I still worked in the Chinese restaurant in my hometown, or if I happened to be passing the place and had the time to spare.

I look at the obits online, biding my time, waiting for P.G.'s name to appear. Wanting to read that her life consisted of a string of failed marriages, the loss of her family home to mold, a lengthy lawsuit that would bleed her bank accounts dry and amputation several of limbs.

I know, I know, I should just get over it, isn't that what Karma is all about; moving on, letting go of the past, doing what you know in your heart is right? I wish I could forgive her, but I don't think she remembers how she done me wrong. How can you forgive someone if you told them that they were forgiven their reaction would be, "Huh?"

T. was lucky in that her biggest bully in high school was killed by her, the bully's, boyfriend. It was the first, and I think only murder/suicide in our class. Not something you'd put in the yearbook but still...

So, this morning I read a years' worth of obituaries from my home state, I didn't recognize any of the names, it doesn't mean that my classmates didn't die, it just means that it wasn't reported to the local paper. Or maybe they haven't found the bodies yet.