Urg
It's been a hard couple of months. Not just for me but for friends, there's a curse on the first of the year. I've suspected as much for years. I need someone to sweep in and help me, but there isn't anyone to give me the help I need because I don't know what kind of help I need. Sure, I need a place to live, but there's more. Once help is here, I don't know how to accept it. I'm embarrassed by needing it then I'm panicking and sending help away while still needing it.
What the hell is wrong with me?
3 Comments:
i'm sorry. it is hard to accept help, isn't it?
and i've always felt spring was a bad time of year, everything bad happens around easter for me.
i take it you're still looking for a new home with not much luck.
Yeah, it is. That's one of my biggest problems - I wish I could get over it. No luck yet.
this time of year is usually awful. even though good things have clearly happened to me in the spring, i tend to think only of the bad thing. fall and winter are much happier months.
as for needing/wanting/accepting help: just remember that sometimes the people helping you need and want to help you as much as you actually need them to help you, so (this is getting jumbled, i know) that's how you learn to accept it. people who really want to help do it out of love, not obligation, which makes it so much easier to take.
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